i will go...

What to do when you hear God calling to some areas of your life but not others. I don’t have job so I am getting worried about how my school loans will get paid because I have enough for another month but after that I have no idea what to do with myself for a job.

I do know one thing that for sure is that God has given me a passion to Go share his love and amazing grace with people. The feeling when you know God is telling you that he wants you to go someplace but you can always come up with excuse not to go but recently I don’t have the excuse it more like Yes God I will go but I doesn’t have any way to fund the trip so you provide that and I will try to get over my fear that I am not good enough to share or know what to say because you will use me. I have grown so much with the help of God in my fear to share about you with people and being a good witness for you.

I can honestly say that I right know I feel the close I have ever been to God and can feel him talking and using my weakness but I still have no idea what I am going to do for a job so that I can pay the bills. I think the funniest thing about the whole thing is I have been do despite to get a new job that I quit my job so that I could move someplace else and know I have a chance and I doesn’t want it. I really like my life here and the people in my life. I doesn’t have that desire to live overseas then being able to go on mission trips but to come back home.

Something that keeps growing bigger in my life is the want to have a man to go through life together. I know this is going to sound really girly but I want to be in love with man that love and respect me. I would love to have someone to go through life with that I can talk and discuss things with. I would love to also have a family. When you see many family and friends around you that have been blessed with a wonderful significant other and our so happy it just something that I want for myself too.

Enough ranting I need to find a job but until that comes along I will be listening to what God tells me to do and I think that means going to India next month to share about God love and how it can change their lives.