bored...

ever since i returned home and been back at work something hasn't been right. its just not the same and i think i finally figured it out. i am bored with my life and what i do. i don't really care for my job that much, it pays the bills. i do like the people i work with but its just not enough anymore. i need something else, i need to be making a different and actually do something with my life. if only i could figure out what that is. this is what i have the hardest time deciding what i want to do. i have gotten taste what it would be like to be a missionary which is something i have always wanted to do. its difficult but one you start telling people that God loves them and wants to have relationship with them it gets easier. when they truly understand what your saying its an amazing feeling. know i think this is something that i could actually do, well once my loans are payed off which will be awhile. i need a change in life something that makes we feel like i am making a different in peoples life and what better way to do that then share with them about Jesus Christ. if i could this oversea that would be wonderful.

Following God

The past couple of weeks I have been in Romania I have felt God speaking to me. I have never really felt it as much as I did well I was there. Usually when I can't decide on something I think God is there telling me which to choose and go with it. Going to Romania I knew that I was doing God's will and what he wanted me to go. That was an amazing feeling. After my trip to Jordan last year I heard that the church was going to go to Romania I thought I would love to go but I won't. It scared me to much. God didn't really want me to do into people home and tell them about Jesus. I couldn't do that. I am the type of person that I have you into my home and I will take care and show you God's love that way by my action. I never felt like I had way with words. So I made other plans on where I wanted to go. Then when that wasn't going to happen God said I wanted you to go to Romania why won't you listen to me. I said God if you get me the money then I will go. You really don't make deals with God because he always win. When in 2 weeks I had all the money that I need to go. I prepared myself to go. God an amazing God and he knows what you can handle and sometime you forget that. I was really worried because I thought I would have to do alot of speaking or preaching parts and I had no idea what I was suppose to say. Plus I didn't really know what I was suppose to tell people when we go into the homes. It started off rough week getting use to what to say but by the end of week I was really getting this and thought I can do this its not a big deal. To help me through the first couple of days God gave me the Verse from 1 Corinthians 2:4-5 "my message and my preaching were not with wise and persuasive words, but with a demonstration of Spirits power, so that your faith might not rest on human wisdom, but on God's power." He also gave me Hagen who has done many of these type of trips to learn from and go with me into the villages. After the trip I had one of ladies that went with me ask did you feel like you were in the middle of God's hand with him taking care of you. Yes, that exactly how i felt. God had everything planned out since he told me about a year ago he wanted me to go, I just wouldn't listen. On our drive up to Iasi the city we would be working in I was put with a different person because the churches I was suppose to work with didn't have that many visit. Then they end up backing out because of new leadership in the church. The churches that I got put with had 150 visit schedule. They need more people to help then just one person. Plus the people I meet and got to work with all week was gift from God. God showed me things that I had been trying hide or not acknowledge for awhile. It felt so wonderful to be in his will and doing what he told me he wanted to do rather then running from it. I have waiting for awhile for things to change and figure out what my next step is going to be. I could feel God telling me just a little bit longer and I will show you what to do next. So I am waiting and willing to see were God is leading me.